Artificial Intelligence

Random neural firings, yet somehow still contrived

My Photo
Name:
Location: Canada

The Beaver Examiner is guided strongly by the belief that you should be strongly guided by our beliefs. Our mission is to A) be proudly independent from the facts, B) provide short stories for short attention spans, and C)keep fake news real.

Friday, February 24, 2006

Friday Feast

Appetizer
Choose one: moving to another state, having triplets, or never being able to eat chocolate again.

Assuming that I can change "state" to "province," then obviously the first one. I'd be happy to move to any of Canada's provinces. If I had to move to the States, I'd probably opt not to eat chocolate. There's plenty of other sweet stuff.

Soup
Name a news story that truly shocked you.

9/11, naturally.

Salad
What was your very first job?

Paper boy. Worst paper boy in the world, actually. I always managed to lose four or five papers per day, then I'd skip the houses of people I didn't like. Other paper boys got hundreds of dollars' worth of tips at Christmas; one year all I got was a pair of gloves from someone who was clearly a gift completist.

Main Course
If you had the chance to read the diary of someone you're really close to, would you? Why or why not?

That's the kind of thing I would start to do, then feel guilty about after about two sentences. I'd snap it shut, heart racing, before deciding there should be some secular equivalent for saying Hail Marys.

Dessert
What's something you're looking forward to?

Earning a five-day-a-week paycheque again.

On another note, thanks to a bureaucratic mix-up I have to return to Canada in April. I'll be staying for about three weeks, before heading back to Austria with a proper visa. Coming home isn't a big pain, but the $2000 it will cost me sure is. I say "mix-up" because I will no doubt have to work with this particular bureaucrat again. Feel free to substitute your own adjectives or nouns that more accurately reflect my state of mind.

Cheers,
John

5 Comments:

Blogger dan said...

If we start rehearsals the day you arrive, maybe we can have a show ready for the day you leave...

Sucks you have to come home, let me know if you need a place to live or anything...

9:33 p.m.  
Blogger The Beaver Examiner said...

Thanks for your support. I'll be staying with my parents. However, if anyone can lend me $2000, then just slide it under my door.

Cheers,
John

12:35 p.m.  
Blogger Lisa said...

When are you back?

10:30 p.m.  
Blogger The Beaver Examiner said...

April 18, for about a month.

Cheers,
John

4:21 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:16 a.m.  

Post a Comment

<< Home